Please read all of these to the end...it will be its own reward.

 

@ +70 degrees Texans turn on the heat and unpack the thermal underwear.
People in Michigan go swimming in the rivers.

 

@ +60 degrees North Carolinians try to turn on the heat.
People in Michigan plant gardens.

 

@ +50 degrees Californians shiver uncontrollably.
People in Michigan sunbathe.

 

@ +40 degrees Italian &English cars won't start.
People in Michigan drive with the windows down.

 

@ +32 degrees Distilled water freezes.
Manistee River and Grand River water gets thicker.

 

@ +20 degrees Floridians don coats, thermal underwear, gloves, and woolly hats.
People in Michigan throw on a flannel shirt.

 

@ +15 degrees Philadelphia landlords finally turn up the heat.
People in Michigan have the last cookout before it gets cold.

 

@ +10 degrees People in Miami all die...
Michiganders lick the flagpole.  (Jenny Star!)

 

@ -20 degrees Californians fly away to Mexico .
People in Michigan get out their winter coats.

 

@ -40 degrees Hollywood disintegrates.
The Girl Scouts in Michigan are selling cookies door to door.

 

@ -60 degrees Polar bears begin to evacuate the Artic.
Michigan Boy Scouts postpone "Winter Survival" classes until it gets cold enough.

 

@ -80 degrees Mt.  St.  Helens freezes.
People in Michigan rent some videos.

 

@ -100 degrees Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.
Michiganders get frustrated because they can't thaw the keg.

 

@ -297 degrees Microbial life no longer survives on dairy products.
Cows in Michigan complain about farmers with cold hands.

 

@ -460 degrees ALL atomic motion stops (absolute zero in the Kelvin scale).
People in Michigan start saying, "Cold 'nuff for ya?"

 

@ -500 degrees Hell freezes over.
The Lions win the Super Bowl!